Marriage without the parents’ consent

Assalam-u-alaikum w…w…

Dear respected mufti sahab,

I am a Sunni Hanafi Muslimah. I was in contact with Mohamed, a Sunni male for the past 12 years. Now I am 25 years old and capable of making my own decisions both legally and Islamically.

When I had turned 19 years old, Mohamed came to my house to ask my hand in marriage. Unfortunately, my father refused, and gave him the excuse that “she is already engaged somewhere else”. Once Mohamed confronted me with this dilemma, I informed him that I was not yet committed to anyone as per my knowledge. Despite this situation, with my parents’ false statement, I still intended to marry him.

Once we both made the decision to get married, we arranged for an ‘alim and 2 witnesses to preside over the marriage. We performed Nikah, with mahr which was accepted as mahr-e-Fatimi and had been handed over to me, the bride. After 3 years we formally registered our marriage with the government.

Now the question is that is our nikah valid without parental consent?

Jzk. Awaiting your response.

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

الجواب حامدا ومصليا ومسلما

Marriage is a relationship which does not only affect the spouses, rather it affects both the families of the bride and groom and the generations to come. Therefore, it is imperative to make sure one only takes this important step after thorough consideration and consultation from their guardians. 

The blessed Messenger (may Allah Ta’ala bless him and give him peace) in many hadith strongly emphasized the importance of performing marriages publicly. Consider the following hadith:

The Messenger (may Allah Ta’ala bless him and give him peace) has said, ‘Conduct marriages in public and perform them in the masjid.’ (Ahmad, Tirmizi)

Furthermore, if people are unaware of the fact that a couple is married, they will have bad thoughts about them. Thus, when a nikah is performed in secrecy, the couple are involuntarily inviting others to harbor ill thoughts about them and possibly start rumors.

In the aforementioned scenario, however, the nikah will be considered valid. Nonetheless, we would suggest that both spouses inform their respective families of the relationship and try to convince them with as much wisdom as possible. Thereafter, they may publicly announce their relationship.

والله اعلم

Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala knows best.

Omar Baig

Approved by Mufti Husain Ahmad Madani