Maintaining family ties in cases of oppression

Salam

My father has committed many transgressions against us, so do we still have to obey and respect him? He still backbites against us and doesn’t provide for us, we always lived off the government here, he has never loved us, he always loved his brothers and sisters and their children. He abused my mother and ruined her life. He doesn’t want to fulfill his responsibilities towards us and he chose to leave the house and he hasn’t even seen our faces for more than 7 years

I understand that he is our father and children have to respect and obey their father but what has ever done for us? He gave away all his money to his brothers and sisters as well as properties and lands. Do we have to respect and obey him as well as keep a relationship with him?

My fathers brothers and sisters have also committed many sins, they took the money that belonged to me and my siblings and my mum. These people also supported my father in his wrong doing, his abuse, alcohol, drugs, adultery etc, they slander my mother, accuse her of adultery. my fathers brothers don’t even pray, all of these people keep backbiting against us.  So do I have to keep contact with these people?

 بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

الجواب حامدا ومصليا ومسلما

We understand the difficulties you and your family are facing, may Allah Ta’ala grant your family patience and understanding in such difficult conditions. In such complex situations, the best you could do is to try and solve the problem with gentleness and wisdom. No matter what the situation is, respecting your father is of utmost importance. Thus, you should make sure you treat your father with love and try to advise him to the best of your ability. 

It is important to understand that Islam is a religion of peace and harmony. Islam does not encourage fighting, enmity and hatred. Rather Islam encourages love, affection and strong family ties. Thus, we advise that you maintain family ties with your relatives and make constant dua for them. Insha Allah Allah Ta’ala will make matters better.

والله اعلم

Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala knows best.

Omar Baig

Approved by Mufti Husain Ahmad Madani